Pregnancy Tales: MILF in Training vs Pregnant Slob, Make a Choice

I’m a MILF in Training and proud of it – confident, coiffed, styled and sexy all the way through my belly bump. Pardon my rant, but here goes. I’m sick of seeing so many pregnant (and while I’m already going there, non-pregnant) women looking like a hot mess. Would it kill you to tame your mane, wear something other than sweatpants while running errands, showcase your best asset (trust me, you have one, if not more!!), and for G-d’s sake put on a little rouge? Surely, you can, and you must, find time to get yourself together in the morning!   

I know what you’re thinking, “this bitch is crazy, she has no idea what my life is like, and she has no idea how hard it is to juggle kids/work/family responsibilities/guilt…” Maybe you’re even thinking, “Why bother? My husband isn’t attracted to my pregnant body anyway. What’s the point?” Or “Well, if I had a celebrity budget that allotted for a personal trainer, a nanny and other perks, maybe I could find time to look amazing like Jessica Alba or Gisele Bundchen, but I live in the real world.”

Allow me to confess, I didn’t grow up with a lot of money. However, I grew up with a mom who always – ALWAYS – looked put-together and taught her daughters the importance of looking good and living a beautiful life on any budget. She was a 360degree role model for how a woman should present herself because she knew it was her job to look good - for herself, for my father and for her children. Finances are not an excuse. If you can’t afford a personal trainer or even a DVD, there are plenty of tips online of what you can do at home with commonly-found items like a chair or nothing at all. As for clothing, ladies, I live in T.J. Maxx and Marshalls, occasionally visit H&M and ZARA, and indulge (when it’s a worthy investment) at Bloomingdale's and Saks. There are NO EXCUSES for looking like a slob and not caring. It all comes down to will power and your desire to NEVER SURRENDER your sexuality, sanity and self-esteem.  

The point and the reason for my rant, this blog and every segment I do on TV is that it, your appearance, DOES matter. Personal grooming and style are tools you and I should use on a daily basis to look amazing in order to feel amazing about ourselves. And, when we are pregnant and dealing with crazy pimples, peeing while sneezing (what the F!*K), sciatic nerve-induced limping and sleep deprivation, we can use every ounce of amazing goodness we can grab onto! Moreover, when we feel amazing we are naturally going to be better wives, better role models for our children, and more productive/happier workers. You know damn well that when you have your shit together, you have a whole different outlook on life and the challenges of the day ahead.

I truly care about you which is why I want you to WAKE UP, get angry with me and then realize your midnight craving for cheesecake or lack of desire to combat stretch marks, isn’t doing you any good.

As I sit here typing at 2:30am because my baby girl is kicking so hard I can’t sleep, I see two choices before us pregnant gals:  MILF in Training or Pregnant Slob. It’s harsh, but that’s the reality of the situation and there is no middle ground.

As always, I welcome your comments.  Something tells me you’ll have a lot to say.